Thursday, February 12, 2009

Happy Birthday to Me!

Yesterday was my birthday... ;)... Hmmm, what's my age again? Seriously, I will never act my age.

Anyways, first of all, thousand apologies to my girlfriends because I could not go out with them yesterday. My family asked me out and also it's was my busy week. Exams and assignments. Cik mah's family and our family went out to together to IMM. And, I got a present ;)... Canon EOS 1000D... Later can testing, testing. Wanted a Nikon but I familiarize myself with Canon already. Think about it, school and friends are using Canon so it will be easier for me to borrow equipments, lens and stuff.

Today, delivering of Plasma LCD TV. Yup, Dad bought like last week. 40" LCD. Get free 25" and compact camera. And also , my parents bought my brother PS3. Wait for the tv, then set up PS3... haha... game on. Then I will forget to do my assigment :)...

Rezeki family.

Monday, February 9, 2009

Change

When I asked him, to sit at home and just talked to me on the phone. His reply was, "Kalau kol pun tak de pape nak bebual".

I was upset but did not show it. We used to talk on the phone almost every night, even though there was 5 minutes silence, not talking. We would watched tv and laughed over the phone. Commenting on the show and stuff. When I called late, he would text me. 2130hr was the time I would always call. He would asked kenape kol lambat lah, ni lah, tu lah... haha... then later I would asked him to change channel to watch some funny show. And we would laughed so hard. :)

I just need one request from him. For that one day in one week, just one day, be at home and talk on the phone. I didn't know that request was so hard to fulfill. I'm mad. Am totally mad. Yesterday he picked me up from work and asked whether I want to spend time with him. I said NO! Here's the thing, when I'm mad, he will start to call, asking whether I've eaten and stuff. Are you free on this day or that. Whatever. And when everything's ok, it will be the same all over again.

His making no effort whatsoever. I don't need a boyfriend has a car, money or bike. I need someone with time.

Love,
nUr

Thursday, February 5, 2009

Untitled

In school. Finishing my project. Wanted to take a rest first. I'm gonna be very busy. No holidays for me. Got ITP at Tanjong Pagar at some interior design company.

My birthday coming soon. And my boyfriend is going oversea. A last minute thing. So no celebration with him. If anyone had a plan and ask me along, let's say on 2 March, I will turn that person down flatly. No second thought. Why? Because it's my boyfriend's birthday. I won't say much. But it just that girls do take anniversaries and birthdays seriously. Sometimes. So I have a plan of my own.

So, don't expect me to go out before or after my birthday. Only exceptional to my girlfriends. I think I sacrifice my time, work and school alot. I know no one asked me to. So, I'm glad for my second year, I'll be very busy. I'll be working from Monday to Saturday, 9am to 6pm. Keep my mind occupy. And my boyfriend can have many, many more times with his friends. Double and triple the times.

See, the problem with me is that it's so hard for me to communicate with my boyfriend. I don't know why it's hard for me to tell him how I felt. Maybe I'm just too tired or just too lazy or hate if there's an argument. Poor Ayun. Then he will be clueless as to why I'm mad at him. Now I know why. Because if I told and be mad at him, it will still be the same. This thing will happen all over again. All he can say is sorry and blah blah blah. He only talk the talk but I need him to walk the talk. So why waste energy being mad.

So this tells me that I have to appreciate my friends. If you a girl, do appreciate your GIRLFRIENDS!! Heck care about your boyfriend. When anything goes wrong, it's your GIRLFRIENDS that will be there for you. Remember, your GIRLFRIENDS!!!! I'm reminding myself too so in future I won't abandon my GIRLFRIENDS for my boyfriend.

Love,
nUr

Tuesday, February 3, 2009

Regrets

Never regret the mistakes you made. Because without it, you will never learn. So whenever I think back, no matter what mistakes or whatever decisions I made, I learn from it.

But I think there was one mistake I made and I regret it. And that mistake was to let my Ayun smoke. He asked me permission to smoke in front of me. I was fed-up, dah malas nak layan, this and that, I said go ahead. It was all because I malas nak layan. Dah malas nak care. From 1 to 2. Then that one day, 4 sticks. Like half an hour apart? My fault. I should have been strict.

I still don't like it when Ayun smokes in front of me. I will be mad if I saw him smoke or saw a cig pack inside his pocket or under the bike's seat. Bile kene tegur je, nanti boring ngan orang. It shows that I still care right? Since sometimes he doesn't care about howI feel, then I think should stop caring. Sometimes he just brushed it off. I don't like it when sometimes he acted like as if nothing happened.

Well, I told Ayun this. Go ahead and smoke. If we were to get married and he still doesn't quit, I told him no babies. Be it a patch or contraceptive pills or whatever. Making sure no babies.

Dang it! Sometimes I can be too drama and too OTT. Haha.

Love,
nUr

P/S Dang it! Soon I'll be one year... younger... hahahah...